Last Sunday, November 30, we attended our last service at
Treasuring Christ Church in Raleigh North Carolina. January would have marked nine years that we
were part of this family. There are no
words to express how thankful I am for the impact this church has had on our
lives. Having only been married a year,
recently moved to North Carolina, and having not yet developed too many
friendships, we met a guy named Robbie Haynes who welcomed us to this brand new
church plant he had only just discovered himself. Little did we know that our hearts, minds,
and souls would forever be influenced by our experiences within our new family.
Kent and Candace Capps gladly welcomed us into small group
and continued to open up their home to us on a regular basis. Over the years they graciously and lovingly
pointed out sin in our hearts and reminded us of the gospel of Jesus
Christ. They modeled Godly parenting and
we saw both great success and heard their hearts as they honestly confessed
when they were having parenting struggles and hardships. Other than one family we observed in college,
this was the first time Josh and I were challenged to think through how Christ
can transform EVERY aspect of your life and how confession and reconciliation
are just as important in parenting as affection and discipline.
The other pastors (and their wives) also greatly influenced
us over the years. Both the Cordells and
the Williams offered advice, counsel, and encouragement during many different
seasons. They consoled us when we were
told we could never have children, they rejoiced with us in the hospital when
each of our children were born, they offered adoption advice as experienced
adoptive parents, and they prayed for us after our miscarriage. We remember being invited over to the
Cordells for Thanksgiving the first two years we could not go home to be with
family. We shared meals with the
Williams family and delighted on lots of Julie’s exceptional chocolate chip cookies.
We took part in lots of TCC location changes. Pastor Sean use to say if you can find us you
can worship with us. When we joined TCC
we were meeting at a run-down sandwich shop that was undergoing a remodel to
become some sort of bar. All I remember
is walking in one week and the entire place had been redecorated to look like a
Tiki hut. This of course was a few weeks
after part of the roof had fallen in the middle of Pastor Sean’s sermon. I remember having to find a friend to hold
the bathroom door closed each week because the knob never worked. And I remember the phone call we got one
Saturday evening to let us know church was going to be in a different location
the next day because Pastor Sean had walked over to the building and seen a
“Condemned- Unsafe for Occupancy” sign on the front door. I can’t remember the exact order of where
TCC moved to next but one thing was certain, no matter where we went we had
trials that continually reminded us that this world is not our home. It helped us, as a church family, to long for
our forever home in heaven.
At John P. Top Green Community Center I remember being so
crowded that many of us sat on countertops in the back of the room and lined
the hallway so we could still hear the sermon.
At one point we were found at 115 ½ Hargett Street, located
just above an old Barbour shop. While
located at this facility, it was understood that women need not wear heels and
coming to church also meant you didn’t have to go the gym that day. You see,
since you had to climb up three flights of steps as well as maneuver around the
random columns and tightly fitted chairs in the tiny room, by the time you left
you’d already had your workout for the day.
The worst was if you had forgotten to use the restroom before the sermon
started because once you were in there was no getting out. Yet, in the midst of being cramped we still
managed to host multiple fellowships including the annual Thanksgiving meal
where we brought in lots of visitors form Moore Square and the Bus Station. I remember that all the members played a role
in making this truly a feast by bringing sides, drinks, and desserts. In addition, we had several karaoke coffee
houses and board game nights where we began to form many friendships with
others in the church outside of our small group. I also remember starting to attend the Sunday
morning bible studies and learning from men Godly men.
I also remember the Chavis community center gymnasium that
we also called the sauna. We resided at
this facility during the summer…the summer their air conditioner was broken. I remember prayer walking throughout the
neighborhood during the bible study hour and asked God to bring people to love
and minister to that neighborhood.
Specifically I remember walking up and down Bragg Street and State
Street. I never could have imagined that
God would answer that prayer by bringing multiple families from our church
(including our own family) to live there.
I also remember a fall festival we hosted for the neighborhood kids
where all the members of the church created homemade games, activities, and
snacks for kids.
I believe it was on TCC’s 4th birthday that we
had our first meeting at the Imax in the Marbles Kids museum. I remember working with Candace Capps, Betsy
Treece, and Char Hanks to plan a big fellowship complete with games and
decorations. I remember having to cook
part of the meal across the street at the church offices located in the Ministry
Incubator and having to warm dishes that other people had brought in the
warmers in the Marbles kitchen. By the
time the sermon was over we would always be exhausted from running around but
it was so worth it to see our family with such happy faces. While at the Imax I remember Kent teaching a
“Creation to Consummation” study where I learned so much about seeing Jesus in
the Old Testament.
Other
fun traditions we developed during this time were Family Room seminars. These were put on every couple of months to
discuss and learn about various topics including marriage, parenting,
counseling, spiritual disciplines, etc.
In addition, we would have daylong women’s retreats (often at other
local churches like Open Door and Vintage 21).
At
Christmas we would always celebrate with advent readings during the Sunday
worship time. In addition, our small
group would always have a Christmas party and a white elephant gift
exchange. You never knew what you would
unwrap; however, it was likely you might get a live goldfish, a can of paint,
or even an autographed picture of Jason Brege.
For several years many of us would go out into the downtown Raleigh
neighborhoods and Christmas carol while handing out information about the
church and sharing the gospel.
I
remember playing on the TCC softball team with the Chiltons, McInnis, Robbie,
Joy Hughes, Joanna, and others. I was so
encouraged by hearing one person each week share their testimony after the
game.
We
had baptisms in the back yard of the pastor’s house. After hearing people’s testimonies they would
step into the freezing water of a horse trough.
After their baptism Ben McInnis would lead everyone through the chorus
of Praise the Lord. One time I remember
Jude Capps, while wearing a shirt that said, “I do all my own stunts,” diving
headfirst into the baptismal pool. Oh,
the memories…
I
remember several years of participating in Hope for Raleigh and Back Yard Bible
Clubs. I remember the incredible
efforts that went into coordinating Convoy of Hope and partnering with 60+
other churches in the Raleigh area so that we could jointly minister to
thousands upon thousands of people in need.
And just over a year ago, we purchased and renovated the
former YWCA. I remember countless hours
of prepping for the “estate sale”, hauling metal to the junkyard, washing
dishes in the kitchen, bleaching toys, painting, and landscaping so that we
could minster better to those in Raleigh.
Over the years Josh and I participated and served in various
ministries at TCC. Some were extremely
enjoyable and others pushed us out of our comfort zones. In all these
capacities we learned about joyfully serving the Lord and we granted
opportunities to connect and build relationships with others. However, small group was always the heartbeat
of TCC for us. We started in the Capps
group, which transitioned to the Styles group, and eventually we began to lead
our own group.
When trying to describe the types of relationships we developed
in small group most people don’t seem to understand. Yes, we made a habit to study God’s word
together, to do book studies, to have in depth accountability but more than
anything it was the development of life long friendships. True friends- those who know the good, the
bad, and the ugly, and love you more for it because, like you, they know you're
a work in progress. Our group was always
unique in how close we became with one another.
We had Fun traditions like girls night outs/guys night outs and hanging
out with one another several days a week outside of formalized church
activities or events.
We had the privilege of introducing couples and attending
numerous weddings. We wept with those
who lost relatives, babies, or children and attended memorials and funerals. Josh got involved in an ongoing fantasy football
league and frequented Axis and Allies nights with a group of guys. For several years we’ve invited friends over
on a weekly basis to watch Amazing Race.
We developed a homeschool cohort for a year with those in the church who
also lived in our same neighborhood.
This was such a blessing. Our
kids had a great time and it was an absolute joy to work with Martha Jackson
and Jen Cox in this capacity. We went to
bible studies in others homes, hosted bible studies in our own home, and even
facilitated a bible study at the YMCA. I
hosted busy bag swaps, recipe swaps, and clothing swaps. I also was held accountable to go to
exercise classes at the YMCA with church friends (specifically Zumba and
Kickboxing). Many of our church friends
helped us move, not just once but some helped us all four times. And, we could always count on our church
family to watch our kids for date nights, doctor appointments, and even our two
5 days trips that Josh and I took to New York and to Denver.
Over the years many of our friends moved on, yet in our
minds they will be forever be part of our TCC family. Although there are too many to name one by
one it is important to point out a few that truly influenced us.
- Kent and Candace Capps, who’ve I’ve already mentioned above, exhibited a perpetual reflection on the gospel and reliance upon the Lord unlike what we had ever seen before.
- Dan and Casey Chappell’s response to the unimaginable loss of a child moved us to trust God more. In addition their heart for adoption and willingness to help others pursing adoption has been truly inspiring.
- Tim and Holly Chilton were one of those families we always admired from afar. Their love for others and passion for the nations was inspiring. We’re thankful for each moment that we did get to spend with them and honored to pray for them as they will soon be serving overseas.
- Martin and Dana Graham truly have an amazing gift of encouragement. Weather it was playing games or talking theology, not one moment with them was ever wasted.
- Jared Hostetler’s devotion to TCC always amazed Josh and I because most college students look for a church that can serve them instead of looking for a church where they can serve. Josh had the great honor of spending time with Jared on a regular basis and would always talk about how refreshing he was to be with.
- M.J. and Martha Jackson were phenomenal neighbors with very similar parenting convictions. Over the years our kids became the best of friends with the Jackson kids and in the few months they’ve been gone we have missed them terribly. Martha and M.J. were always a couple we could turn to for wisdom and advice.
- Autumn Leggett babysat Addi as a newborn a few hours a week when I was still working which was a huge blessing to this momma’s heart who desired to spend every waking moment with her new baby girl. Autumn, Heather Hollander, and Lisa Burns all invited me to hang out with them and other TCC families when we lived in Wake Forest. This was such a blessing because although we were not part of the Wake Forest small group I feel like I still have good fellowship with other believers from our church throughout the week.
- Paul Sarazan served joyfully above and beyond what anyone ever expected of him. He was great at recognizing and affirming giftings in others. I was so thankful for opportunities to serve work along side him. He and Amy’s dependence upon the gospel left Josh and I hopeful of how God would continue to use us and passionate to continue serving in the church.
- Teresa Sanders is and will always be a sweet friend to me. I cherish the countless times we’ve talked, laughed, and cried together late into the evening. It’s always refreshing to have a friend who you can be completely vulnerable with and whom you know will not judge you but who will love you in spite of your sin struggles and who will be faithful to pray with you and help you fight for righteousness. She loves my children and they ask about her if we’ve not seen her in a few weeks.
- Eric and Ashley Sinclair demonstrated deep-rooted faith in the midst of painful loss. I remember being astonished at how firmly they clung to truth in the midst of tragedy. Their trust in the Lord and his sovereign plan will forever impact my soul and their example of Godly suffering inspires me to daily be thankful for each and every thing we’ve been blessed with.
- Josh and Charlotte Styles displayed unending hospitality and generosity and spurred us on to love others more than ourselves.
- Betsy Treece has and still is an encouragement to me because of her intentionality. She pursued me in times when I felt lonely and continues to love me even when we don’t get to see one another as often as we would like.
There are many other families and individuals who seem to
have been at TCC just as long as us, if not longer. These individuals we will miss terribly but
are thankful for the many ways they impacted us in the years we spent
together. Again, there are far too many
to name but some of the individuals include:
- Danny and Kari Breed are genuinely motivated by their convictions and dedicated to being intentional in all that they do. This is so refreshing in a world where most people just fall into the trap of following cultural norms and what’s most popular or convenient at the time. Josh has always admired Danny’s scripture led prayers and dependence upon the Holy Spirit. I admire Kari’s patient and thoughtful parenting inspired by none other than the word of God. Their lives are a constant reminder to thoroughly think through choices we make for our family in light of the gospel.
- Jason and Cary Brege host the best game nights and nothing beats their annual settlers tournament! Cary and I got to know one another when we were spontaneously paired together for Julie William’s Amazing Race Birthday Extravaganza. At the time we were deemed the “Working Wives” and proudly biked all around Raleigh in our green team shirts. As life changed and we both became stay at home moms, we were able to set up play dates for our kids. Addi and Josiah love spending time with her boys no matter where are or what we do; however, their favorites include the Pullen Park Drum Circle and swimming at the YMCA. I love spending time with her because her passion for social justice and the practical ways she loves others always reminds me that Jesus came to serve and help those who cannot help themselves.
- Sean and Natalie Doherty are a couple who are always fun to be around. On many occasions they invited us into their home and more times than I can count we just enjoyed one another’s company by playing games, working on puzzles, watching football, or having conversations about things that truly matter in the world. Natalie’s vulnerability, honesty, genuine care for others, patient parenting, confession of sin in her own heart, pursuit of peace and reconciliation, and teachability continually remind me of God’s work in our lives. I see so much grace in Natalie and it reminds me that the Lord can do the same work in my own heart. From the moment I met her I’ve always thought that if I had my way, I would choose to spend much more of my time with Natalie. Josh spoke often of Sean’s care for other brothers in Christ and how he was very sacrificial in how he chose to love others.
- Kate Forrest is rarely seen with out her radiant smile. Her steadfast love for the Lord and unwavering hope even in the most difficult circumstances and pain of loss have spurred my heart to be thankful and trust in the Lord.
- Jeremiah and Dori Futrell are always a joy to be around. Josh had the great pleasure to work with both of them for a while. Jeremiah is one who is quick to affirm God’s grace in the lives of other believers and Dori is full of wisdom and encouragement.
- Heather Graig is one of the most faithful women I’ve ever met. Her dedication and incessant service to the church is remarkable. She is a prime example of what it means to lay your life down for others. She is a loyal friend, a wonderful confidant, and I look forward to her distinctive knock on our front door.
- Allen Mayberry you can always count on for a good laugh or a practical joke. And although he keeps us on our toes, is a faithful and dependable friend. As long as we’ve known him he has exhibited a willingness to serve others without a second thought. Our kids love Mr. Allen and get so excited anytime he joins us for dinner, a football game, and especially when he offers to babysit.
- Dave and Kim Miskiewicz’s faithfulness to serve and care for the children of TCC is inspiring to say the least. Working with them was always a joyful learning experience because of their humble leadership and love for others. I often told Josh that I wish I could spend a few hours every week with Kim because of how much I admire her. The few opportunities I did get to go to her home and play in her garden or relax on her back porch were some of the most meaningful moments.
- Matthew and Melanie Moore are certainly treasured friends who I anticipate will be part of our life until the day we leave this earth. Matthew is a friend to all and it’s amazing to see how he genuinely loves others with the compassion and sincerity of Christ. Melanie’s desire to learn and grow in her relationship with the Lord is so encouraging. She constantly is asking challenging questions and talks often of what she is learning in her quiet times. On many occasions she is faithful to ask the hard questions and willing to learn together what the will of the Lord is for our lives.
- Blair Rouse is greatly admired by my husband. Josh speaks often of how he longs to be like Blair because of how quickly and effortlessly the gospel is on his lips. He is one of the most humble men we’ve met and his gift of encouraging is astonishing. One time Blair and JulieAnne invited us to go on a beach trip with them even though we had a fussy newborn. They spent the entire weekend serving us and a house-full of other TCCer as if we were kings and queens.
- Charity Starchenko offered me hope and encouragement on the day a doctor told me that Josh and I would never be able to have children. She spoke truth to me and reassured me that God is greater than our longings and desires. She continued to remind me of this for the months and years that followed. She also was continually offering advice about adoption and I was thrilled each chance I got to do a craft fair or yard sale with her. She is a very talented photographer and generously volunteered to take maternity photos for us when we were pregnant with Addilyn as well as a set of family photos about two years ago.
There are others who I feel like within the past year or so
we were just starting to know well.
Although we are sad to leave these individuals we believe that many of
them are forever friends who we will not have any trouble staying in touch
with. Many of them (Pinkneys, Gregorys, Rounds, Princess Grimes, Eric Bates) had joined
our small group. We loved seeing these
individuals on a regular basis and each of them pushed us in unique ways to
love Christ more. For example, Gray and Karen Kidd pursued spending
time with us even though it was often a challenge because of our crazy
kiddos. Gray’s excitement for life never
ceased to amaze me. Karen was always
willing to spend time with my kids and I no matter what crazy adventure we were
up to. It was clear that through this
and several times the babysat for us that they, like Jesus, were excited to
serve others joyfully. We had also
established a few relationships within the past year outside of our small
group. Two that stick out very clearly
in my mind are with Erin Leanheart
and Tracey Duncan. Tracey and I became fast friends soon after
they came to TCC. When they remodeled
their kitchen she would come over to our house to wash laundry and I truly
cherish the times we got to talk and chat about what God had been doing in our
lives. Anyone who has taken the time to
get to know Erin would agree with me that their life is more full because of
it. Erin is quick to listen, slow to
speak, wise and understanding, and faithful to pray. She, on many different occasions, has
ministered to my heart with kind words as well as offering humble, biblical, and
sound advice. When we move, I will also
miss randomly seeing each of them in classes at the YMCA.
During Josh’s Commissioning, Pastor Byron prayed something
that I’ve known for a while but had yet to put into words. He recognized that as we transition into
another church family some friendships may fade and others may not change at
all despite time spent apart, distance, etc.
The following are a few families we are convinced that will forever be
apart of our lives. Over the years we
have seen God’s grace in allowing these friendships to flourish. These individuals are not just our pals or
some random acquaintances we’ve deemed friends.
These individuals have been our closest brothers and sisters over the
course of time. They have seen us in
good times and in bad. They have
rejoiced with us and wept with us. They
have sacrificially served us and have forever impacted us in a way that I could
never fully put into words.
- Robbie and Dana Haynes- Robbie embodies someone who knows his own gifting and uses it to bless others. He has an amazing memory and pays close attention to detail. Josh and I continually are inspired by how he uses this to purposefully bless others. Dana is a great listener and help me process through anything and everything. I love spending time with her but it always seems to go by too quickly. One of the most rewarding and restful vacations our family has ever had was spending time in the mountains with the Haynes (and Tom and Marie Johnson). We got to experience hiking some beautiful trails, playing beside some majestic waterfalls, as well as doing a bible study together that spurred on great Godly conversations. Our kids, from infancy, have loved the Haynes kids and gladly call them their best friends. Addi and Noah have already danced together at weddings, we celebrated their 3rd birthdays at a joint party, and one year we even dressed up for Halloween together (Addi was Pebbles and Noah was Bam-Bam). These, among other things, have been so special. In addition, Josiah and Noah are the perfect wrestling buddies and Addi delights in helping care for Eva. Most of all, we’ve loved the spontaneous dinners and play dates that often happen with the Haynes. We are so thankful for this family and are excited to see how the Lord continues to grow our friendship in new ways over the years to come.
- Ben and Becca McInnis- Quite literally we would not be where we are today without the McInnis. Ben convinced Josh to consider moving across the street and be neighbors when we thought there was no possibility of us owning a home. However, it wasn’t when we lived across from one another that our relationship began, in fact God began using the McInnis family in our lives soon after joining TCC. Josh and Ben worked together at several different jobs over the course of 5-6 years. Late night conversations about life or football was not just typical for them, but anticipated. Anytime we have a decision to make, Ben is one of the first people that Josh pursues to help him evaluate options. Ben is faithful to always ask hard questions and to offer wise counsel. In addition, Ben’s faithfulness and dedication to serve as the Worship leader at TCC has been phenomenal. He rarely takes a Sunday off and it is evident that his desire is to prepare our hearts to hear and respond to the preached word. Every single Sunday we benefit from the songs he has chosen and it seems they always fit in with what our hearts are already craving to sing. Becca is a great encourager and confidant. I have always felt comfortable talking to her about anything and everything. She makes going to the gym and working out fun. She motivates me to endure and pushes me to do my best. She is gifted in many ways but her humility is always what’s most inspiring and encouraging.
- Josh and Traci Gallaher- I’ve had the joy of knowing Traci for over a decade. When I met her, as her freshman orientation leader at Shorter College, I had no clue how God would orchestrate the path of our friendship. Josh and Traci both served as RAs under me at Southeastern Seminary and it was my absolute joy to witness them fall in love and get married. Traci had already been a member at TCC but when Josh decided TCC would be where they would attend as a family I was thrilled. From that point we were able to spend time with them on a weekly basis in small group as well as began hanging out as often as possible throughout the week. Josh and Josh can always be found deep in conversation about work, football, and especially theology. For over a year Josh and Josh met regularly to talk through potential future options of church planting. Although, God’s made it clear that is not what he has for us, I know that my husband doesn’t regret one second that he has gotten to spend with Josh Gallaher. Traci and I share so many of the same passions, especially around topics such as discipleship, biblical femininity, and the power of God’s word that sometimes it’s hard for us to find a good stopping point. We thoroughly enjoy the company of the Gallaher’s and find ourselves calling them often to hang out, play games, or have dinner together.
- Rion and Kristen Bell- To try and articulate how we’ve have seen God at work in the lives of Rion and Kristen or to summarize what a blessing they have been to us is absolutely impossible. Kristen and I joked, after only being friends for a short while, that one day we would be gray-haired ladies sitting on a porch somewhere rocking in our rocking chairs and talking about the “good-ole days.” As each day passes this thought is only more affirmed. I know beyond a shadow of a doubt that she is, what Anne of Green Gables would call, a “bosom buddy.” There is not a thing on this planet that we can’t talk about. Kristen is one of the very first people I call anytime there is anything I need prayer for or anytime I’m excited about something. It is a very rare thing for two women to care so deeply for one another and for their husbands to connect just as closely; however, Josh and Rion’s brotherly love for one another is yet another evidence of God’s grace in our lives. Josh respects and appreciates Rion beyond anything I can describe. If I began to list specific ways the Bells have shown us love over the years I would inevitably fail. Again, although we are leaving TCC we know that this is a relationship that will preserve and thrive despite any changes that take place.
So, in summary, we are thankful for the many, many ways that
Treasuring Christ has impacted us. And,
although we are sad to be leaving we are excited to take what we’ve learned and
share it with others at Calvary Baptist Church.
We pray that in this time of transition (and for as long as God has us
on Earth) that we will faithfully honor Him and strive to bring Him glory. We plead with you that if you are not part of
a church that will help you to fulfill the same mission that you seek one
out. Being part of the Treasuring Christ
Church family has grown us beyond anything we could have imagined and only a
healthy church can push you to love God and love others in the way the Bible teaches.
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